I want to throw a tantrum, stamp my feet on the ground and shake my fists in the air.
I jus want to get away from here. Don’t feel like working.
Want to be at marine drive take a walk, feel exhilarated. Look at cute guys and pass dirty looks at the ones who think they’re cute. Look at the rich dogs on the road and wish I had one myself. Smell the sea breeze, feel cold and wish that someone was hugging me instead of their jacket.
I want to go to the quaint little church of the Convent of Jesus and Mary and kneel down at the altar and speak to God—one on one. The pews filled with flowers and little hymn books and the rays of the sun streaming through the stained glass windows.
I’m a pathetic artist, and my artistic abilities are restricted to merely buying ten-rupee coloring books from the train and filling them using my cherished Staedtler color pencils. But I suddenly want to buy a canvas and an easel and oil paints and just paint, de-stress, throw my emotions into the colors, create magic and beauty.
I want to cozy up against a non-existent fire-place with a mug of hot chocolate in one hand (with whipped cream and a tight hug!!) and a wonderful book in the other—all-engrossing, and emotionally arousing.
I want to light candles in my room, and see the shadows dance on the walls. Leave my hair loose, feel beautiful.
I want it to rain, pour in torrents, and I want to drench and soak in it. Feel the water seep through my clothes, my skin. Turn my face up towards the sky. I want to smell the mud, and see the trees glistening with rain drops, and the city with a newly laundered look to it.
I want to walk on a clean beach, barefoot, collecting shells. Look beyond the horizon, at a ship sailing far away.
I want to attend someone’s wedding and pig out on all the food, see the love that is shared between the happy couple.
I want to get drunk without drinking and fall off my chair, tipsy. I want to release myself and let go of all my inhibitions.
I want to sleep in a log cabin, with a fire crackling cheerfully in the fire place. Want to sleep between satin sheets all cozy and read another book. Put on some soft soulful music and be with myself.
Am I asking for too much ??!!!
4 comments:
not at all..infact..thee are more than half the things there that i would want to do myself, and i think im going to make my own list :D
but ya LET GO. TOTALLY..hold nuthing back...and go outright n do atleast five things today!! and u know u'll feel wonderful after that :)
"I want to light candles in my room, and see the shadows dance on the walls. Leave my hair loose, feel beautiful."
I absolutely love that one!! and i can completely relate to almost all of your tantrums/wishes! if only we could throw one whenever we felt like...and actually watched our wish get fulfilled!!! you know...you really inspired me to make my own list...like Fatema said, feel wonderful about yourself and about life by making at least a few of these happen :) :) :)
ha...now i wud talk abt the changes which u were talking abt....u think the circumstances have changed u completely...n u had a fear of changing so much tht u may loose the originality....
dun worry darling...u hv become definitely a better human being...u knw y...coz dis innocent kid within u is still alive...who wants to have fun...who wants to enjoy at the fullest...who is not scared to state what she wants...n so would want to experience all the happiness in the world...even if u r tired she ll be all fresh....she ll be the one who ll protect ur originality...
u arent asking too much...u are just asking a break..frm the responsibilities, the tensions, the stress u go thru...
u knw wat is my wish...i wanna once steal a bottle of thumpsup frm the vans which take them frm shp to shop ;)... love u darling miss u so much...so many things to talk...wil jus sit n talk one day..n have a walk too...
nope ure not askin fr too much sometime its just so necesary tht we let go emotionaly, and the things u wrote i wanna do most of them my self most of the time lol . mwah
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